The One Whom I Thought was "The ONE"
Need I not mention about this intellectual being I dated when I was in college. I thought he was my Soulmate, if such a thought exists. I somehow knew he was "The One". My friends already knew this story. I met him when I was 18. There was some sort of an accident. That was my first time to go hiking in the woods. I was still in UP Manila. Eight months after that, while I was enrolling in UP Diliman, I was a new transferee then. I went directly to his room for a prerog and this professor's first words to me back then was, "Have I met you somewhere?"
"Smmoooothh!!!," I thought.
"No, sir, I don't remember," was my reply.
"You look familiar and I don't forget a face. Wala ng slot for Kas 1 kung yun ang pine-prerog mo," was all he said.
Well, I did get into his class because I was doing my prerog for another class of his, another subject. I managed to get my one and only 1.25 from him. And I did get to date him a few months after that sem. And then he had to run off to some university where he wanted to get his PhD.
After a year I got to see him again. He was supposed to be here for only eight months then so I grabbed on to the opportunity and asked him if he could be my boyfriend for that span of time. I thought he said "no" when he explained to me that "all he wanted was to be intimate with me but doesn't want a commitment."
I emailed him for I don't know how many months afterwards, still hoping. Until I finally gave up and entrusted myself into the hands of Fate. And told myself, "Kung di ukol, di bubukol." I stopped sending emails regularly. Made it a point to just send him one in a quarter.
After four years, he came back home for good. Well, it would have been romantic if he waited for me and I was just waiting for an ending for this story of mine. At the back of my mind I knew he probably had either a girlfriend or a wife with him. Now, how to find out for sure which one was the challenge.
I did manage to find an excuse to see him again. Don't ask me what it was.
I didn't have the never to ask him if he was married or not. I would just ask him, "Kumusta ka na?" and hope that with that question would come the answer I wanted. But it never came!
I had to find it out from another friend that he was married. That was probably the saddest day of my life. Nevertheless, I got over it.
Now, I would sometimes pass by his office. Not only to see him again but to remember the romantic, bambi-eyed gurl I used to be. I would then garb myself with my tallest clogs and my flimsiest sundress. And with some satisfaction, he would react to everything I'm wearing. I am happy... my ego has been fed.
At the back of my mind, "Well...I'm single and you're not."
Too bad he didn't wait for me. As for me, I had no regrets.
It's just now that I keep on yelling, "NEXT!"
"Smmoooothh!!!," I thought.
"No, sir, I don't remember," was my reply.
"You look familiar and I don't forget a face. Wala ng slot for Kas 1 kung yun ang pine-prerog mo," was all he said.
Well, I did get into his class because I was doing my prerog for another class of his, another subject. I managed to get my one and only 1.25 from him. And I did get to date him a few months after that sem. And then he had to run off to some university where he wanted to get his PhD.
After a year I got to see him again. He was supposed to be here for only eight months then so I grabbed on to the opportunity and asked him if he could be my boyfriend for that span of time. I thought he said "no" when he explained to me that "all he wanted was to be intimate with me but doesn't want a commitment."
I emailed him for I don't know how many months afterwards, still hoping. Until I finally gave up and entrusted myself into the hands of Fate. And told myself, "Kung di ukol, di bubukol." I stopped sending emails regularly. Made it a point to just send him one in a quarter.
After four years, he came back home for good. Well, it would have been romantic if he waited for me and I was just waiting for an ending for this story of mine. At the back of my mind I knew he probably had either a girlfriend or a wife with him. Now, how to find out for sure which one was the challenge.
I did manage to find an excuse to see him again. Don't ask me what it was.
I didn't have the never to ask him if he was married or not. I would just ask him, "Kumusta ka na?" and hope that with that question would come the answer I wanted. But it never came!
I had to find it out from another friend that he was married. That was probably the saddest day of my life. Nevertheless, I got over it.
Now, I would sometimes pass by his office. Not only to see him again but to remember the romantic, bambi-eyed gurl I used to be. I would then garb myself with my tallest clogs and my flimsiest sundress. And with some satisfaction, he would react to everything I'm wearing. I am happy... my ego has been fed.
At the back of my mind, "Well...I'm single and you're not."
Too bad he didn't wait for me. As for me, I had no regrets.
It's just now that I keep on yelling, "NEXT!"
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