The Married Man Magnet (final version)

I hope I would not be the woman known for breaking up marriages. So far, I’ve been dodging both propositions and the practitioners left and right.

I have been propositioned by more than four married men in the span of one year! Doesn't that say enough? Gawd, I hate married men. Yes, they boost my confidence up by a notch kasi feeling ko I'm so darn irresistible but I feel like I am constantly playing mind games with them.

Around December last year, a woman I don't even know called me up to inform me that the guy I was going out with was her husband. Ooops! She saw my calling card with her husband’s belongings and decided to find out for herself who the person was behind the name.

I met the guy in chat, it was August and it was raining, I was running around Sunken Garden with a soccer ball that time. I agreed to EB* (*chat term for eyeball) him near the coconut tree. Let's just call him caveman. He's tall, he's dark, and he’s quite a looker, pogi siya! He's a sports buff but not your typical jock. I thought for a good-looking guy he's smart and maaaaaaaaaan does he have muscles on the right places on that tight, lean body of his. He did say he liked dressing in women's clothes... NOT a turn off! I like weird men and their weird habits. I was in love with a tranny caveman!

He asked me if I could be his girlfriend. I remember asking him if he had one already existing, he said, “NO,” so I accepted him. Stupid me, I think I should have asked, “ARE YOU MARRIED?” instead.

He was a Greek god all right but he was also a liar. He had a wife. She was nice to me on the phone...SOOOBRANG nice... probably one of the reasons why I decided not to see him again... him and his tight, lean, muscular, Greek god statue-like body. I must be out of my friggin mind!

Oh, but it didn’t stop there! He was very persistent. He started texting me anonymously ala stalker type last June. And after a lot of question and answer portion using sms text messaging did I discover it was him, not the other guy I had a crush on that time, who was sending me steamy, lewd, and horny messages. I was afraid he might hurt me---a friend told me he might even decide to stalk me and hurt me in the process.

Facing my fear just last week while crossing the street, there was this car which slowed down while I was crossing the street, and I was three houses away from mine. The car stopped, honked at me then the driver rolled down his car window. It was the caveman.

I wanted to run to my house and hide but I thought, “Matingnan nga tapang nito.”

So I stood there on the middle of the street facing him, waiting for him to turn his car or for him to get off his car and make a scene. Maybe he will start calling me names--- names like whore or bitch just like he did when he was sending me those text messages or he'd probably pick me up and whisk me away. I waited for him to make his move. He just waved and drove off.

I thought, “Wala ka rin palang sinabi.”

Another guy from the Internet, *hinted* on me weeks ago. Gauging from the chats I had with him, his desire to have an affair with is probably more like an escape. He did say that he just felt like he wants to run away from all the responsibilities of being a husband and a dad ... even if for just one night.

"Why do you choose me?," I asked.

This guy tells me, "You have this twinkle in your eyes... atsaka when you smile... when I look at you... parang ang naughty mo."

Not that I wanted to be naughty. I was just being me. I DO smile a lot.

So I brushed him off with a statement, “As much as I want to have an affair with you... Can you see I'm having a hard time deciding right now? You’re really smart and I like that in a man, and you're also very, very attractive.”

And then I added, “I guess I want to save both our souls by saying NO. You see, I’m a saint...they call me St. Louie around here.”

It’s a good thing he bought the whole thing. You don’t really tell a married man “I don’t want to have an affair with you” right away. You take your time, parang chess, you study their moves first and you study them. I think most of them feel like they are being challenged "hinahamon baga" when they are being turned down. So they keep on trying until they do get to make you say yes. It is a tiring game but at least I think I’m getting smarter by the minute. Note to myself, I should start playing chess.

So he asks me, “If I were single, you think you might actually be attracted to me?”

Well, I like talking to him but he was not really my type. So I lied. I said, “Yes.” He has not bothered me since.

Recently, I met another one of my former dates, one of those guys I used to go out long, long time ago, one of those smarties I love to talk with who I end up liking altogether. Only difference, this one was my first love. I thought he was The One. But I did find out one December that he was already married.

I met him a few weeks back, after all the kumustahans and he sees that I’m getting comfortable with him, he then comments, “Parang lumiliit yata boobs mo.”

At the back of my mind, it’s probably the bra, but what the heck he’s probably kicking himself for marrying his wife and his next words confirms this, “Wife ko kasi lumiit pa lalo yun boobs kaka-exercise.”

Well, well, well... mas madali ngang hulihin ang tandang kapag nakatali. Too bad he's married and I'm not!

Another creative idea came to me, “You want groupie tayo? Sama mo wife mo, sama ko friend ko. That way, hindi adulterous ang dating kasi alam ng asawa mo. And you get to see my boobs pa! ”

What can I say, he hasn’t bothered me. His wife is not into that daw. hehe

It was a bluff, of course, but he need not know that.

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