To Kink or Not to Kink

Need I not mention about this intellectual being I dated when I was in college. I thought he was my Soulmate, if such a thought exists. I somehow knew he was "The One". My friends already knew this story. I met him when I was 18. There was some sort of an accident. That was my first time to go hiking in the woods. I was still in UP Manila. Eight months after that, while I was enrolling in UP Diliman, I was a new transferee then. I went directly to his room for a prerog and this professor's first words to me back then was, "Have I met you somewhere?" "Smmoooothh!!!," I thought. "No, sir, I don't remember," was my reply. "You look familiar and I don't forget a face. Wala ng slot for Kas 1 kung yun ang pine-prerog mo," was all he said. Well, I did get into his class because I was doing my prerog for another class of his, another subject. I managed to get my one and only 1.25 from him. And I did get to date him a ...

I hope I would not be the woman known for breaking up marriages. So far, I’ve been dodging both propositions and the practitioners left and right. I have been propositioned by more than four married men in the span of one year! Doesn't that say enough? Gawd, I hate married men. Yes, they boost my confidence up by a notch kasi feeling ko I'm so darn irresistible but I feel like I am constantly playing mind games with them. Around December last year, a woman I don't even know called me up to inform me that the guy I was going out with was her husband. Ooops! She saw my calling card with her husband’s belongings and decided to find out for herself who the person was behind the name. I met the guy in chat, it was August and it was raining, I was running around Sunken Garden with a soccer ball that time. I agreed to EB* (*chat term for eyeball) him near the coconut tree. Let's just call him caveman. He's tall, he's dark, and he’s quite a looker, pogi siya! H...

I hope I would not be the woman known for breaking up marriages. "There's nothing sexy about me." "I am not a sexual being." "I would rather not explore my sensuality." I have been propositioned by four married men in the span of one year!! Doesn't that say enough?! Gawd, I hate married men. Yes, they boost my confidence up by a notch but I feel like I am constantly playing mind-games with them. Last December in 2002, a woman I don't even know called me up to inform me that the guy I was going out with was her husband. Ooops! I met the guy in chat, it was August and it was raining, I was playing soccer and that was where I agreed to EB* (*chat term for eyeball) him. Let's just call him caveman. He's tall, he's dark, he's quite a looker! He's a sports buff but not your typical jock. We both came from the same university and I thought for a good-looking guy he's smart and maaaaaaaaaan does he have muscles...

God, kung mabait ka nga, pasikat ka naman! Ewan ko ba kung anong meron ngayong gabing ito at init na init ako. Sana umulan. Umuulan pa ba ng October? Dapat sana malamig na paligid ngayon kaso bakit hindi pa rin? At bakit ang init-init?! Tutal wala naman tao dito sa kwarto ko, makapagtanggal nga muna ng shorts. Tinamaan naman ng lintik! Bakit kasi ang init na nga sa umaga, ang init pa rin sa gabi?!! Kailangan ko tuloy tapusin lahat ng mga so-called freelance projects ko sa gabi. Day 1 God, I think I'm good at being a bum. I am SO good! I think I'm gonna professionalize it. Kapag may nagtatanong kung ano trabaho ko ngayon, sinasabi ko na lang na bum ako para walang usap-usap. Mahirap ipaliwanag pa, eh. Pero OK na rin to sa halip na wala akong ginagawa. Kailan ba naman nangyari yung wala akong ginagawa? Kahit sa sarili ko, I'm bumming around ngunit sa tingin ng ibang tao busy ako. I never really asked to do this, basta kusa lang lumapit. Biglang may pondo na...

To Kink or Not to Kink... that is the question... Questions have been running through my mind for quite a long time now. Should I make and design my own website or leave it to the experts? Should I write about erotic longings or just keep it to myself? Or should I just write such orgasmic burstings deep in the confinement of my ever growing notebooks safely hidden inside my storage boxes? Eversince people have been reading what I've been writing...the more uptight I've become. Everything I say or do could be used against me. I hope nobody can find me here... hmmm... here I go again with my ever precious anonymity and with my ever famous words... I hope. "I hope nobody notices me." "I hope nobody finds me." "I hope nobody's watching." "I hope nobody sees me." And other words like... " I don't want to be known." "Why choose me?!" "I just want to be like the rest." "The...